There is a kind of man who curses his father
and does not bless his mother.

Proverbs 30:11

Let’s talk about the sin of omission! That’s what today’s key verse is talking about concerning a “kind of man” (or woman) who does not bless his mother. I think it is interesting that the father is injured by the displayed sin and the mother is broken by the sin of omission. Does this refer to the God-given bent of a mother as a nurturer? I believe it does and moms who have experienced the emptiness of this sin of exclusion know first-hand just how devastating it can be. It is like the wind taken out of a sail; deflated, drifting, dysfunctional.

First, let me say, we moms must cut those apron springs if we want our children to grow into God-fearing and well-adjusted adults. That has been God’s plan from the beginning of time. As moms, the foundational goal of raising our kids should be to raise them to be independent of us and totally dependent on God! But, that doesn’t mean we become invisible or irrelevant to our children; or it shouldn’t mean that. That is NOT what God intended and we have discussed this at length in earlier posts of these 31 Days About Mothers. 

[Note: Just a reminder that “man” in this verse and throughout the Bible refers to mankind or the human race which includes women.]

Look at our verse again, “There is a kind of man” or woman. In other words, not every man or woman “does not bless” their mother. It is a certain kind of adult child that omits their mother from their adult lives whether intentionally or simply by self-absorbed neglect. This egocentric adult doesn’t just happen. It starts early, especially in our modern western world. And if it starts early in childhood, guess who has had the main influence to teach the beautiful art of blessing others? Who has the greatest opportunity to exhibit to a child to be others-centered and not self-centered? Mom!

It isn’t always the case. Very few things are that cut and dry to be “always”. But when moms fail to be others-centered or when they smother their child into being the center of the universe, then they shouldn’t be surprised when their child turns into the “kind of human” who is not others-centered and therefore does not bless her either. Or in other words, a mom shouldn’t be surprised when their adult child or even their teen child does not give her a second thought. Painful! But not unexpected. 

Remember!

Train and guide our children to be independent of us and totally dependent on God!

In doing this our children have the foundation to build a beautiful life of living for others and not self. Of course, what a child does with this God-given foundation is totally their choice. Moms cannot choose this for their child. But we can teach and guide and stand on the foundation of Jesus Christ and Him Glorified! But the child must choose! So, don’t let Satan or your own self-talk put you on a guilt trip if you have been sent adrift by your children’s neglect of you. 

It is your child’s choice. It is hard and painful and lonely. I know and I am so saddened you are in that place of drifting. Keep trusting Jesus! Keep praying for your child! Keep or start being others-centered!  

God is Not Finished!