He who walks with wise men will be wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm. 

Proverbs 13:20

 I remember my parents telling me often, ‘Choose your friends wisely.’ And we told our kids the same thing and they are telling their children the same thing. Why has this sage advice been passed down from generation to generation? Because those giving the directive know just how damaging choosing foolish friends can be and they don’t want their children and grandchildren to experience the same heartache. It’s interesting though, that each generation seems to have to learn for themselves just how vital wise friends can be! Will we never learn?!

This is another contrast verse in Proverbs. If we walk with wise men (friends) we will be wise, but if we are a companion to fools, we will suffer harm. We will handle fools in a future month, but let’s look at the good news at the beginning of this verse.

I love the imagery of ‘walking with’. It is the idea of what we call, ‘doing life together’. A person who walks with us in life: knows us…they get us…they enjoy being with us and value our whole person, and not just on the good days. Hopefully, our spouse is such a person. Sadly, for many that is not the case and I am sad for them. Someone who is supposed to be a ‘wise one walking with us’…just is not which brings a heap of trouble and sorrow. I have friends in such relationships and I know just how much they value their wise relationships outside of their marriage, it helps them to some degree. But, even for those of us in solid ‘wise walking’ marriages, having one or two other wise relationships is so very helpful and enriching. 

We’ve moved a lot in the last 15 years…a lot and not just across the street, but cross country! Sometimes we’ve been able to establish close wise relationships with fellow believers which helped the ‘moving pains’ immensely. But, some of the moves didn’t bring those friends and it was much harder on our marriage and on us individually. Godly companions improve every area of our lives and we in turn should be enriching those companions. 

Oil and perfume make the heart glad, so a man’s [woman’s] counsel is sweet to his friend. [mine]

Proverbs 27:9

A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NLT)

We should have a diverse group of people within our circle of influence, but our closest companions should not just give godly advice, they should BE wise in God’s eyes. Let’s choose wisely!